Discharged from ED services!

So today I saw my nurse who I have been meeting with for the past year for the last time and I am now discharged from the eating disorder services!

I have such mixed feelings!Part of me is proud and happy to have found my own recovery in such a short space of time.But I am also sad to be leaving.I will miss having a place to go to weekly where I can talk about any problems,joys,struggles etc without fear of being judged.I learnt to let down my guard,to open up to others,to the world,to the concept of recovery and being “good enough”.

When I first started treatment I did not completely believe I could get better,or did I think I deserved it.But bit by bit I have pieced together a life that is wonderful and worth living.Despite the highs and lows I am happier than I have been in years and I finally see a future worth living for.I still have some work to do but an eating disorder is no longer central to my life.

I saw the best Nurse and she really inspired me to try my best as a nurse to help others.I will miss seeing her a lot.I am awful at saying good bye as I get so attached to people.Im not good at moving on and the idea of not seeing someone ever again makes me sad.As cliche and cheesy as it may sound this year has been life changing and I am so grateful for the treatment I have received.I learnt crying is not a sign of weakness or failure and that it is ok to let your feelings show.I’ts ok to struggle and not be perfect as long as you do not give up.

I hate the diagnosis of anorexia/bulimia but recovering from it has taught me a lot about life and had I not had the eating disorder I may not have encountered certain people or situations.Recovering from this has made me into the women I am today.Determined to stay strong and healthy.I hope that in some way I can help or inspire others and show that it is possible to recover.

I am sad to be leaving treatment,sad to be leaving behind my eating disorder.But with every ending comes a new beggining.This is a fresh start.I can start university with a clean slate.

For those who feel hopeless,know that there is always a way out of this hell.You need to give it everything you have got and REALLY want to get better.You will struggle and it might get worse before it gets better.Revovery will be painful and hard but most of all it will be worth it.

FIND YOUR STRENGTH

Yours sincerely

A hopefull,happy human

19 thoughts on “Discharged from ED services!

  1. Michele Elkins-Hoffman

    Oh my word, reading your blogs is like reading my own thoughts, or about my own life. I am still struggling with the eating disorder, but I know God will take that burden from me in His perfect timing. Bless you…….courageous is what you are. Loves.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I teared up while reading this… Don’t get me wrong, I’m so so proud of you but while reading this I realised all of the stress my best friend had to go through. She got admitted to a hospital as an in patient literally days ago and I’m still trying to organise and calm my thoughts down. I’m hoping that she can find the strength that you found. This was a beautiful post I wish you so much happiness and success in the future – good luck in Uni! Much love xx

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    1. Thank you for taking the time to read.
      Atleast you now she is in good hands now and has the support she needs to recover.It must be really hard for you as a friend.You can read up articles on how to support someone with an eating disorder.The best you can offer her is love,support and understanding.Its a hard and difficult process so it’s great that she has a caring friend like you.
      If you ever need anyone to talk to or she does my email is urszu.kraji2009@st-pauls.me.uk
      Wishing you both all the best!Xx

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much lovely – I’m so much calmer now that she’s getting help because it’s been something I tried to help her through for months now and it really just got too hard. I will definitely keep your email saved, hopefully update you when she gets better…

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      2. Trying to get someone with an ED to get better and get help can feel like fighting a losing battle.If you ever feel frustrated or upset with her just remember it’s not her it’s the illness.Also remember to take care of your health too.Xx

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