I was meant to write this post yesterday before work as I was feeling particularly happy, grateful and free but then I fell asleep. Story of ma life haha.So basically this is just some things I felt grateful for yesterday/other the past few days.
1)Spending time with others and actually being present.
So yesterday my dad was working from home so I suggested we go on a walk to the woods with my dog. Me and my dad have not always gotten along, particularly the last few months. Because of our working patterns I don’t see my dad that much some weeks so it’s really nice to go on a walk together and talk and laugh and we have really good banter too and inside polish jokes! I am really grateful to be able to go on a walk to the woods now and enjoy it and no longer feel like speed walking the whole thing! Its so great to be able to concentrate on a conversation with someone rather than have your mind taken over by ED thoughts or low mood or being anxious.
The other day I had a bit of a messy shift at work.It was pretty busy I had a table of 15 and a full section so was rushing and I was carrying a lot of plates and one fell off on this guys coat (It was a really nice coat too) but luckily he was chill about it and all the sauce came off and they still left a tip.
3)Best team at work
I also slipped in the kitchen and swan dived and fell with all the plates. I have a real nice bruise now! One waitress really helped me out and asked if she needed to beat any up for me hahaha.But yeah I’m grateful as some people don’t like their job or who they work with but I really do.
4)Feeling free from ED thoughts and good mood
I hope it lasts as I love being able to eat sweet potato fries and cake at 11pm at work like other people and not give a damn.To be able to wake up in the morning and not feel like binging/purging. To not step on the scales 10 times a day. To smile and laugh and for it to be real. To not feel like just sleeping the day away. Sure I might not be completely free of eating disorder thoughts all the time but I feel way more “normal” and human than a few months ago.