Reflections on a full day of recovery

I am not sure what finally clicked in me yesterday but I was suddenly full of determination to really go for ED recovery. I made a promise to myself to have a minimum of 2500 calories regardless of how I felt.I told myself “Whatever the external circumstances,eating remains constant.” and repeated this throughout the day.

So I woke up at around 8 am rather full from the night before so I grabbed a banana and 2 cups of coffee with some sugar before walking my dog and going to the shop to get some milk to make breakfast.

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For breakfast I had 1 cup of oats cooked in 300ml whole milk with apple, cinnamon and honey and an egg. If you struggle with binging or just find yourself hungry quickly after breakfast I really recommend the combination of porridge and eggs. It always leaves me satisfied.Just make sure to have a decent portion!80-100g oats is filling I find. Plus oats, milk and eggs are quite cheap so good if you are on a budget. Also it’s really easy to make porridge energy dense and more varied by adding nuts,peanut butter,honey e.t.c.Also whole milk is a great way to get extra calories in and essential fats.

After that I did some tidying and I also went to the city centre to post a letter and just had a waddle around the shops.Soon it was 12:30 and I thought it would be a good time to get some lunch as I have dinner quite early when I work evenings. However restriction thoughts started creeping in.Despite this I decided to bash on and went home, grabbed lunch and went to the park with my dog to eat lunch out of the house.

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After lunch I did some light weights at home for about 15 mins. I wondered if this was a form of compensation but It didn’t feel like it.With ED recovery particularly at the beginning bloating and stomach pain is horrible but normal. Just power through! Drinking coffee seems to help so I made a small mug with some milk

At 2pm my wonderful friend came round and we blogged away for 2 hours. After that we took my dog out for a short afternoon walk. It was a nice way to spend the day.

Dinner was chicken breast,tomato and and rice and pulses.I was a bit anxious because of some tension in the house but that’s normal and just another hurdle to leap over and keep going!So I shovelled dinner and grabbed pudding which was some seed mix!Dense and perfect to have on the way to work.

 

Work was surprisingly not busy. I do love work and he people there! I count work as one of my greatest blessings.

At around 7 pm I made a frothy coffee. Basically a cappuccino.Such a coffee addict haha!I actually finished earlier than expected due to how unbussy it was. Upon returning home I grabbed a had a big box of blueberries with natural yogurt and raspberries.Which was tough as there was no one to sit with and binge urges were high. For so long I hardly ate any fruit or veg as it made me weigh lots more because of the water content. Which I realise is silly. Simple solution; DO NOT STEP ON THE SCALE EACH DAY. Weight fluctuations are NORMAL.I just wish my dad would do me a favour and put the scale away!!

And so I had reached 2500!In some ways I could not believe it! I had finally had a day of proper recovery.After a few particularly bad weeks today I felt liberated and hopeful like I had not in so long.Tomorrow will be good. I CAN and I WILL. It sounds cheesy but this is for my friends,Mum,dog,my future patients( if I do decide to stick with nursing next year) and just health and life in general!

Also I realise counting calories is something which should preferably be avoided but at the moment I want to make sure I get enough and if it helps stop binging and purging then I will utilise it for the time being.But yeah I would normally recommend staying away from calorie counting.

 

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